A breakup or divorce can be one of the most stressful and emotional experiences in life. Whatever the reason for the split—and whether you wanted it or not—the breakup of a relationship can turn your whole world upside down and trigger all sorts of painful and unsettling emotions. As well as grieving the loss of your relationship, you may feel confused, isolated, and fearful about the future.
But there are plenty of things you can do to cope with the pain, get through this difficult time, and even move on with a renewed sense of hope and optimism.
Even when a relationship is no longer good, a divorce or breakup can be extremely painful because it represents the loss, not just of the partnership, but also of the dreams and commitments you shared. relationships begin on a high note of excitement and hopes for the future. When a relationship fails, we experience profound disappointment, stress, and grief.
A breakup or divorce launches you into uncharted territory. A breakup also brings uncertainty about the future. What will life be like without your partner? Will you find someone else? Will you end up alone? These unknowns can often seem worse than being in an unhappy relationship.
This pain, disruption, and uncertainty means that recovering from a breakup or divorce can be difficult and take time. Grief is a natural reaction to loss, and the breakup or divorce of a love relationship involves multiple losses:. Allowing yourself to feel the pain of these losses may be scary. Just remember that grieving is essential to the healing process. The pain of grief is precisely what helps you let go of the old relationship and move on.
While these emotions will often be painful, Getting over divorce and moving on to suppress or ignore them will only prolong the grieving process.
Knowing that others are aware of your feelings will make you feel less alone with your pain and will help you heal. Writing in a journal can also be a helpful outlet for your feelings. Remember that moving on is the end goal — Expressing your feelings will liberate you in a way, but it is important not to dwell on the negative feelings or to over-analyze the situation.
Getting stuck in hurtful feelings like blame, anger, and resentment will rob you of valuable energy and prevent you from healing and moving forward. Remind yourself that you still have a future — When you commit to another person, you create many Getting over divorce and moving on and dreams for a life together. After a breakup, it's hard to let these aspirations go. As you grieve the loss of the future you once envisioned, be encouraged by the fact that new hopes and dreams will eventually replace your old ones.
Know the difference between a normal reaction to a breakup and depression — Grief can be paralyzing after a breakup, but after a while, the sadness begins to lift. Day by day, and little by little, Getting over divorce and moving on start moving on.
When mom and dad split, a child can feel confused, angry, and uncertain as well as profoundly sad. As a parent, you can help your kids cope with the breakup by providing stability and attending to your child's needs with a reassuring, positive attitude. Support from others is critical to healing after a breakup or divorce. You might feel like being alone, but isolating yourself will only make this time more difficult.
Connect face-to-face with trusted friends and family members. People who have been through painful breakups or divorces can be especially helpful. They know what it is like and they can assure you that there is hope for healing and new relationships.
Frequent face-to-face contact is also a great way to relieve the stress of a breakup and regain balance in your life. Spend time with people who support, value, and energize you.
As you consider who to reach out to, choose wisely. Surround yourself with people who are positive and who truly listen to you. Get outside help if you need it.
The most important thing is that you have at least one place where you feel comfortable opening up. If you feel like you have lost your social network along with the divorce or breakup, make an effort to meet new people.
Join a networking group or special interest club, take a class, get involved in community activities, or volunteer at a school, place of worship, or other community organization.
A divorce is a highly stressful, life-changing event.